I feel so lost.

The semester hasn't even ended. I haven't even graduated. But for some reason i feel disconnected already.

So it turns out i'm probably the only one out of us all who's going to graduate after this sem.

That sucks because while everyone's in school, i'll be working.

And i'll be leading a completely different life from them.

And of course everyone will have an honours, and i'll only have a B.A.

Not being able to go on the diving trip makes me feel even more disconnected.

All this is probably entirely my fault. But still.

I only imagine it'll get worse after i graduate.

Times like these i feel like chickening out and just sticking it out in school even if i don't graduate with my honours.

Feel like i've lost my footing.

Feel like i'm playing the waiting game.

Waiting for when i finally fall into that dark abyss that is the future.

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I am officially burnt out.

I think feng can tell from my absence in classes.

After i decided to graduate after this sem, i just felt all the drive seep out of me.

Because now there's no point working so hard.

Because working hard now is not going to make enough of a difference to help me land a job.

Because right now all i'm thinking of is what i'm going to do after i graduate.

Graduate.

It's quite scary really.

How time passes so fast.

And unlike all the different boundaries you've stepped over... This one is the quantum leap from childhood to adulthood.

What happens after this, really no one knows.

What becomes of friendships forged over canteen tables and notes passed in class and pressing deadlines?

What becomes of the person who comes home only having to worry about finishing homework and remembering to ask the parents for their allowance?

I guess only time will tell.

One can only hope that all that one holds dear to themselves is not transient.

I woe the future which lies ahead simply because it is unknown. The fog which clouds it is so dense it allows no light to shine through. The destination is obscured, so all i can do now is clutch my hope to me and pray it leads me to a safe place.

Goodbye carefree childhood.

Hello duty-ridden maturity.

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Your Birthdate: February 24

You understand people well and are a natural born therapist. A peacemaker, people always seem to get along when you are around. You tend to be a father or mother figure to friends, even to those older than you. You enjoy your role, and you find that you are close to many people. Your strength: Your devotion Your weakness: Reliance on others for happiness Your power color: Lilac Your power symbol: Heart Your power month: June

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During ethics class today on the topic euthanasia:

Yifeng: "... Yeah lah, that's similar to the abortion thing what."

Me: " Huh? What abortion thing?"

Yifeng: " The stupid foetuses thing lah!"

Me: " Wahaha! So now they're stupid?:P"

Yifeng: " Well they don't exactly have brains do they?? So they're stupid lah!"

Me: " T.T"

Isn't my friend just so interminably cheerful and nice!? Mwee^^

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